He said…

I was having a really craptastic day a few days ago. I vented to a good male friend of mine about some of my feelings. I will share some of what he said… maybe I need to come back to this post and read some of his comments when I’m having another “one of those days”.

You see, this male friend of mine…. we have a different kind of relationship. He’s been here for me through the whole divorce. The only reason I know him? I called him the night I found my husband and his wife fucking in a vehicle on the golf course. Never spoke with G before and hoped I never had to make such a phone call.

Fast forward… we’ve become very close and have been there for each other for about 3 years now. We are definitely more than friends…. but not a committed relationship for a few different reasons. Maybe some day though. I know this may sound really weird to some of you that are reading this but shit happens and we have met under the weirdest circumstances, yes…. but when he holds me…I don’t think of his ex (the one that had the affair with my husband) and I never have thought of any weird feelings when I’m with him. I have a calmness around me when he’s near me. He makes me laugh like no other… the list goes on.

I’m sure I will speak a lot of G in this blog because he is an important person in my life.

Anyway, he made me feel so good the other day. The kind of good that you don’t look for but it just happens when kind words are shared.

I was feeling blah one day and we were google chatting. He always wants to know how I’m doing… we share our thoughts for the day… we vent to each other (he’s going through a major custody battle right now and that’s a huge reason “we” aren’t “we” right now).

I was explaining some of my health issues and that I was going to go back to WW. He said “A, I want you to go back to exercising for your stress and health issues but what I don’t get is… your weight isn’t an issue to me”. I said REALLY? But…. it is to me. He said “sexiness comes within you and YOU, make me feel like I have never felt before”. . . He continued to say “my ex wife never made me feel the way you make me feel in and out of bed”. “You enjoy being with me and I can feel that when we are together”. He continued to say some of the sweetest things I’ve ever heard from a man’s lips. I was feeling “pretty” yesterday and mentioned that and he said “you should feel pretty everyday, A…. you are beautiful”.  My heart melts.  Maybe it melts more because I know we are not committed and I know he’s not just saying these things to get me in bed… he’s telling me because he genuinely means it.

This man is a gift to me whether we become more serious down the road or not. During my hard times he was there making me laugh….during his tough times – – like right now – – I am there for him making him smile and laugh. It’s certainly become a wonderful friendship if nothing else.


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November 2009
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